Put me in, Coach!

Yesterday morning was my "Big Monday". Yes, the Monday that every dieter, weight loss wonder, "Insanity" beginner and "P90x" probationer talks about twenty Sundays in a row as they sip their "last drink" and eat their "last drunken cheeseburger" for a while, fully aware that the following weekend shenanigans will ensue and back off the wagon they will go. Yep, that was me. Sitting at my own place of employment, sipping on beachy drinks for Cinco de Mayo claiming that "tomorrow I prep to be a bikini girl!"  

Yeah okay Magen. 

That happened again the following Sunday, obviously. Drinks less beachy, but Hooters wings shortly followed and by 9:30 I was in bed wishing I'd been able to say "No!" to my best friend Jack Daniels. So at 5:30 yesterday morning, my alarm went off, as even drunk me had been able to do, and I begrudgingly made my way to CrossFit. This, however, is the part of the routine that is easy. Getting me to CrossFit, sweating the whiskey right out of my veins and feeling like a million bucks again isn't the tricky aspect of my Mondays. It's the intense list of supplements, proteins and foods (at specific times and after doing specific things) that were the cause of my mini manic Monday. 

Allow me to explain. I am now a crossfitter, but also a bikini competitor in-training.. And I have a coach. Hoping to land a sponsorship by a CrossFit/fitness apparel company by placing in my first show in August. Yes, August. So it all hit me, upon the arrival of my huge shipment of supplements and vitamins (and cute new bodybuilding.com gym bag) that my nights of getting bloated for a drink with the girls and not being on my A game at CrossFit, or now my body building work outs - just wasn't worth it anymore. So after making it through day 1 I am now attempting to begin day 2. With my girl Kahly, for cardio session Tuesday at the local LA fitness. Here goes nothing! 

Oh! Later today I will be posting everything that's been going on for the last year plus, and you know, explaining my new bikini pro dreams! Rise and Grind fitness freaks! It's TUESDAY! Time to do work!

Twitter @magen_wooley

Instagram @magenmaria

Almost 2 years later..

Rise & Grind my fellow fitness freaks!

I stumbled upon my old blog posts from almost two years ago and immediately began laughing at my old self! The post prior to this from OCTOBER OF 2011, whined and moaned about mountain climbers and burpees! Good God if those were my biggest CrossFit hurdles today, I'd be a happy girl! 

To catch ourselves up to speed with everything that has changed over the last 15 ish months, and to document what has come of my CrossFit career & future there within; I hereby break ground on my new fitness blog! 

Almost 40 pounds lost, countless "Personal Records" and new skills gained and here I stand almost an entirely new person! The left picture is me, back in October 2011, when I first posted about finding CrossFit on a business card at the Smoothie King I frequented. The right hand side is me, a little over a month ago before the Hooters Calendar shoot. 

I know, I know - so much to fill everyone in on! But for now, I have to go meal prep, take some vitamins and drink some protein. I sound so fit right? But really, it'll all make sense shortly. 

Until then; 

Find me on twitter @magen_wooley

&

Instagram @magenmaria 

You want me to do what?

I stumbled upon Crossfit after seeing the dramatic weight loss and muscle gain of a few friends of mine over the past few months. I figured it was because they had been training for Air Force and Navy boot camp and never really bothered to look into it. That is until I ran across a flyer for a free week of training at "Crossfit Thoroughbreds." Now if that name doesn't draw you in, the pictures of the amazing results on the flyer will. I immediately grabbed a few and headed to work determined to make someone come with me. One of my closest friends had done it before at a different gym and was sooooo down to do it again to get back into bikini shape. (We DO live in Florida, on the beach and she owns a boat. HELLO?! what other motivation do you need?) After convincing another close friend and coworker to come with us we headed out at the ass crack of dawn the following morning.

The following ensued.

Two laps around the block (equalling .5 miles)
50 supermans (don't laugh, my ass STILL hurts from these things!)
50 sit ups (crossfit style, all the way laying down, to up touching your toes)

Before you start shaking your head, we did this 3 times. After a warm up that killed us, and then finished with practicing handstand push ups, mmhmm, doing a push up, upside down in handstand form.

Needless to say, I was sore when I woke up this morning for day two. Only two of us went this morning.. Not calling anyone out but SOMEONE slept in and then took an epsom salt bath, lucky brat. We warmed up with some form of weighted PVC pipe that we had to loosen our arms up with because today, we were lifting. Today's hilarity went as follows..

Ten push ups.
Ten dead lifts with the lightest bar they had (which still killed us).
Ten burpees over a hurdle. (jumping to the floor on your stomach, push uping yourself back up and then leaping over a hurdle while clapping your hands above your head.)
Jump rope 100 times.

We did THIS lovely number five times through.

I am in pain just typing this. However, Bucket List which I plan on continuing until I am the CrossFittest Woman in the WORLD: CROSSFIT!

Feeling Nostalgic.

It was a successful weekend in ThetaLand. My Little sister now has her own Little sister, my Greek family has new babies to take care of and guide through their next (approximately) four years, and for all intents and purposes we initiated 60 happy and bright eyed girls into our sisterhood. Congratulations ladies!

You knew that couldn't be the extent of this right? Okay good!

Part of the fun of getting a little and initiation week is crafting goodies for the new girls, baking things that they will be running off for the next month, embroidering our letters on shirts, hoodies, towels, tote bags, back packs.. You get the picture.. and then finally revealing our chapter's deep dark rituals and ethic codes to the girls once they've taken their oath to forever hold them dear to their hearts. AKA, they have to swear on everything they are that they won't tell a soul what out hand shake is, what our saying "YBM" means, etc. It brings every Theta across the country and even over seas together. When you see letters you know you have a sister and that you and she know things the rest of the world doesn't. It's kind if exciting and empowering actually.

In our particular sorority, our girls aren't allowed to wear letters until they are officially initiated. Meaning they can wear shirts that say "Kappa Alpha Theta" like it's going out if style but they can't wear "KAO" until they are a sister. It's one extra step we take to ensure that every girl representing our letters knows just what they mean and that they are representing something bigger than themselves. With those letters come great responsibility. You're probably thinking "Okay Obi Wan Kenobi".. But really it's special, and I'm beginning to realize, finite.

When I joined 3 years ago, I wanted all of that. Sisters, a big, a ton of littles, socials, boys, to live in a mansion with 45 other girls, to paint banners, be in dance practices until 2am for philanthropies, be president some day. Everything except that last part came true too. Then I became a Senior in college, realized I was spending thousands of dollars and hundreds of tireless hours on things and people who weren't going to get me a job when I graduated. Yes holding a position within my organization looks great on law school applications and résumés. I can honestly say I found my maid of honor in my big sister and that I would take a bullet for my littles. I planned socials, networked, raised money for an amazing organization (CASA - court appointed special advocates, Kappa Alpha Theta's national philanthropy, google it they are incredible), and truly have memories that will last me forever. I'd like to think that the hours I put in, relationships with other organizations I helped establish and the money I raised & spent shaped my chapter. No, I firmly believe those things.

This where it gets tricky. When I left, I trusted that my sisters would keep on the path that the girls in my Theta generation and the ones before me carved. Forever classy ladies, forever diverse, intellectual and beautiful in and out. I handed my position to a girl who I hoped would choose socials with fraternities who appreciated all if those things, helped elect a president we had faith in to keep building our sisterhood both within our girls and from a public relations stand point and took part in recruiting girls who we loved and trusted to recruit in the same manner. That's where we, as inactive and alum have to take a step back and watch, and hope for the best.

My letters, even through the ups and downs of my experience in the Greek system mean the world to me. I am a Theta for a lifetime and the lessons I learned transcend into life, even if the years I spent in the sorority were the FARTHEST thing from REAL life.

Bucket List of the day: Pass the torch to my littles. Faith, Hope & Love.. And the greatest of these is love. Good luck girls, make me proud standing where I once stood :)

To gay or not to gay?

That is the question..

After my exhausting, not to mention spectacularly steamy mid day in Florida, trip to Orlando my Big and I spent dinner time at Chipotle discussing the evenings events. My Little showed up and got in on our drama filled hash session of did-you-hear-about's and sorority gossip. While sitting there I noticed a relatively hip looking grunge female duo walk by hand in hand. Now under normal circumstances I wouldn't bat an eyelash and would probably comment on how awesome one of the girls shoes were. But tonight, I comment on something totally different.

The other day I was on Facebook, casually stalking a girl who I kind of know via an ex boyfriend whom she also dated. She moved to another state shortly after graduation to pursue a career clearly unavailable in our retirement town. She has dated a few, dare I say, very handsome men.. She has rubbed elbows with celebrities, been on tv shows, a couple commercials and won a few singing competitions. Don't get me wrong, the girl won a particular gameshow by flaunting her obnoxiously large breasts and giggling way too loudly, but that constitutes a cable tv career, right? The point of this is not to establish my semi-jealousy of her but to point out that after a thorough creeping of her page I realized, homegirl has a girlfriend!

Now I understand that there are a number of explanations for this Facebook Official Relationship Status, but believe you me, I did my research. My Facebook friend lives far away, the girlfriend lives in my state. FB Friend has begun a tattoo brigade of side pieces and wrist quotes, the new GF has a full sleeve of cartoon Gay & Lesbian rights activism. Seriously, it's been mobilly uploaded. FB friend travelled cross country to post pictures of them making out with the caption decidedly reading "Love comes in all shapes and sizes.."

Okay, back to my trip to Orlando, I now find myself sitting on a friend's couch listening to his flamboyant advice on a fresh new sorority dramafest. Now, why on EARTH would my sophisticated, successful and fabulous Big be listening to a boy's opinion on such a matter? Because he's the token gay bestie, duh! We discussed his take on Greek life, chit chatted about boys, booze, his favorite gay bar & bar tender, our jobs, over time at them, Disney Land, Halloween Horror Nights, life, death, and then the fact that it was time for us to go home because he was tired and it's 3am.

When we got home and flipped the tv on (I know a motif of WANLM -with a name like magen- already..) Real World, no I haven't given it up permanently, was on. The new season is in San Diego and they have their token lesbian this year as well. However she wasn't the one being called nasty names this episode. It was Frank, the bisexual hot head to called a bar rat "trashy" because she was guzzling their liquor. She in turn took one glance at the cameras and proclaimed "we're getting kicked out of VIP by this *insert f word that means pile of sticks here*". At this point it dawned on me! Holy inappropriate! Yes, we all slip up and declare that something is gay, as if it means lame, stupid, weird, or any other word with that connotation. So why did hearing the word faggot grab my attention so quickly when I'm using the word gay to be just as hurtful in my every day vocabulary? At that very moment I decided, enough is enough. I love "A" my Big's boy bestie, whether he's black, white, yellow, red, likes boys, girls, Britney Spears or Justin Timberlake, so why slap him across the face every time I want to insinuate that something is annoying, repugnant etc. It's time to stop. To gay or not to gay? Definitely have a gay confidante, definitely don't tell him he's gay for not coming to your party.

Bucket List; change of vocabulary. Love comes in all shapes and sizes guys :)

Two wrongs make a.. No?

It's that time of the year in sorority land, even if you're alum and technically don't have to attend anything! My little is getting a little. That's right, I'm a grandbig. You're probably laughing hysterically at the fact that my "pretend" family is growing but in the eyes of my fellow sorostitutes, this is huge! Like those awful Fucillo Kia Commercials HUGE!

However, this is also a huge night in the eyes of my coworkers! It's Val's Wednesday night! Our boss plays our favorite songs, we sing along as we take shots of Jäger and Jameson, drink Bicardi Limon & Cranberry's and pretend half of us won't wake up hung over, smelling like smoke and funky beach locals. Politically you have to be at these nights to stay on bossman's good side (how warped is that?! best job ever, I know!) When your name is Magen and earlier this week you pissed the other manager off by calling him on his sexually driven, Uzbekistanian infused harassment.. You need to be at Vals tonight. So what do I do?

Given that I'm currently en route to my alma mater to see my faux family and hit up a couple gay bars with my big and her boy bestie that loves Britney Spears more than the 12 year old me, I'd say it's safe to say I made my decision. I did, however; call my boss to profusely apologize and make sure he's not mad at me. After receiving the "I could never hate you.. I'll just miss you" text, I dubbed it safe to proceed. That's right, I made a decision, told one side sorry but I can't make it and took off! Now, if you know me at all you know that doing such a thing normally involves pulling teeth, twisting my arm or threatening my life. I'm as indecisive as a two headed turtle in a tortoise race.

Behold, bucket list of the day.. Learn to say no! Check... Well, I made a step in the right direction. :)

OMG DTF Smoosh WTF?!

No, I don't really talk like that.. Anymore. So why is it that every single show I watch is mind numbingly scattered with abbreviations that hardly make sense in context? I woke up this morning, ahem, this afternoon plopped on the couch and turned on my mother channel. MTV. Why, you ask? Who the hell knows! Most likely because, until a few days ago I related to most of the shows on it. I would KILL to be on Real World.. Pretty much so I could compete on the Challenges (don't play like you wouldn't absolutely love to get all of your primal competitiveness out on your fellow bitchy cast mates for $250K). I would definitely be better than Sammi Sweetheart on Jersey Shore if I could fake the accent, and let's get real.. At the end of this blog The Buried Life will have some stiff competition!

Fortunately I had a life changing epiphany this "morning" when I flipped on my favorite channel only to realize that "Awkward", a spin off of last year's "My Life as Liz" isn't relatable to my life as Magen in the slightest. No, I am not struggling with having sex in my childhood playhouse with the most popular guy in school! I am certainly not worried about mean girls anymore, unless we're talking about the nasty girl at my work who swears she doesn't have fake.. Nevermind. No, I am not 16 and pregnant nor am I a teen mom.. In fact I'm now rendered incapable of being one having reached the Eden of a "twenty-something".

I then began flipping channels and stumbled upon a fabulous woman looking to be about 25 ranting about her southern morals and the characteristics her future husband WILL have. I think we found a winner folks! Her counterpart and best friend on the show, Matty, a handsome "twenty-something" single southern man got on screen a few moments later proclaiming that he isn't a player if he's honest to the numerous women he takes out about his intentions. And by intentions he means, lack thereof. OMG guys, this is my new favorite show. Sure, I'm totally against the d-bag guys of my home town who tend to sleep around and attempt to hide it (as if you're fooling our one horse, small world, town?). But watching a guy be totally up front in taking 4 women on a dinner date together, while watching a gay man who knows more about cars than I do (few and far between even for a straight man), and getting to see a women I want to model the rest of my twenties after hunt for her husband?!?! Sign me up! Thank you Most Eligible Dallas, I have a new mother channel.

Bucket List of the Day! Graduate from MTV to Bravo :) Check.